Thursday, May 28, 2009

Theme 8

"I can't imagine being anywhere but here! I mean the late night surfing, the boardwalk fries, and the warm breeze. Who wouldn't want to live here?" Ryan said to her best friend Kelsey.

"Yea, I no what you mean! But don't you want to do something more with your life."

"I guess eventually yeah, but for right now I just want to enjoy life for what it is, theirs no rush!" Ryan said.

"You are almost eighteen, and everybody is going to college and getting jobs. It's time to get on with your life!"

"You sound like my mom, you just need to lighten up!" Ryan said, chuckling.

Kyle their friend from school walks up to them, "Hey Ryan ready to go surfing?"

"I’ll be right there!" Ryan said. "You coming?" she asked Kelsey.

"No. I’m good I gotta be home for dinner. See ya!"

Kyle waited for Ryan to catch up and they walked to go get her board and then down to the beach. Ryan loved surfing; she loved the feeling of the wind in her face and the thrill of riding a wave. And she loved that you never knew what was coming next! After they were done surfing they walked back to Ryan's house. 

"So Kyle, what are you doing next year?" Ryan asked him, still thinking about the conversation she had with Kelsey.

"I’m going to UCLA! Sorry, gonna leave you here all alone." Kyle replied.

"What makes you think that I’m not going anywhere?" Ryan said sarcastically.

"C'mon Ryan, it's you!?!" "No offense or anything."

Ryan laughed, "Yea I guess I know what you mean." But on the inside even though Ryan put on the act that nothing mattered she didn't like the fact that nobody thought she was going anywhere in life. She was getting tired of hearing it from everybody.

Ryan was kind of upset so she went home, grabbed some chips and a soda and plopped down on the couch. Nothing was really on though; nothing was on MTV and on E! it was Brad Pitt which she had already seen. As she was sitting there, she had a revelation. She was going to prove to everyone that she could do something with her life. She decided that instead of going to boring college that she wanted to travel. But Ryan didn't want to go to France or Greece, those places seemed so over rated. She was thinking of something more extravagant. More like...Africa! Ryan went on her Mac and started looking up places to go, she wanted to help children in need, go in one of the Peace Corps or helping things. After an hour or so of looking surfing the net, Ryan found exactly what she wanted to do.

“Mom, mom!” Ryan yelled while running down the stairs. “I have something I need to talk to you about!”

“What is it honey?” Her mom asked, a little shocked that Ryan was excited to talk to her.

“Okay so I have this idea, and I think you are really going to like it!”

 So Ryan explained to her mom that she wants to join a group and go to Ethiopia to help feed the poor, build houses, and schools. Her mom was surprised by the idea, but she didn’t say no. So Ryan went to go start packing! The group she wanted to go with was leaving in only two weeks! She had so much to do before then.

Even though Ryan’s mom didn’t give a definite yes, Ryan went and told everybody what she was going to do. She was going to show that the unreliable, lazy girl could do something good with her life.

 When Ryan told Kelsey she freaked out!

 “You are going where? To do what? I can’t believe it! You actually do listen to some things that I say I guess.” Kelsey said.

 “It’s not just you, I am just tired of everybody telling me that I won’t do anything with my life.”

 “Awww, well I am going to miss you so much! How long are you going for?” Kelsey asked.

 “It is going to be a couple months I think, I still need to finalize the whole thing with my parents.”

 “Oh I see! Well then I think we need to go shopping! You do not have a lot of time!”

 “Yea you know me, always spur of the moment!” they laughed. “Not everything has changed about me!” Ryan said.

 They walked off together to go shopping and get all of Ryan’s stuff together.

 In the two weeks leading up to the trip Ryan had so much to do! It kept her busy and not too anxious about the whole thing. Until the night before, she started having second thoughts.

 “She went to her mom, “I don’t know if I can do this, I mean who am I kidding, I am still the same person who doesn’t carry through with things and is lazy and-

 “No, no honey stop it, this is the most excited I have seen you in a while, and you will be doing a great thing and helping a lot of people. And everybody here supports you!”

“Yea you are right,” Ryan said getting a little more encouraged and excited again.

 “Now go finish packing and get to bed, you have an awfully long day ahead of you.”

 The next morning Ryan was sitting on a plane to Ethiopia! She finally had made a good decision! She still knew that the hardest part was ahead of her, but she showed everybody that she could be hardworking when she wants to be and is not going to do nothing with her life.

2 comments:

  1. ryan is a lazy girl who doesn't know what to do when she graduates from high school. All her friends are talking about going to colleges but she doesn't really want to go to college. One day she decides to travel the world in order to help people. Ryan becomes excited and she now has a feature. For structure changes you could add more descriptive paragraphs because you use a lot of dialogue. Style changes could include more descriptive language. Your conventions for the most part were good besides the occasional mistake for dialogue use. Otherwise, i enjoyed the story and felt that you did a good job!

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  2. Ryan is a girl and her friends think she is a joke. They feel she will not do anything with her life, and she wants to prove them all wrong. She joins a peace core that will travel to Africa, making a difference in her own life. Structure is mostly conversation between Ryan and her friends. There is hardly any explaining, only showing, which is really good. The style is meant for teens to read it and connect to what Ryan is going through. For conventions, you should have the dialogue a little more casual. So instead of saying "i do not" say something like "i don't" like make it more relaxed conversation. But I like how she has second thoughts but decides to go through with it, makes for a good end.

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